On October 24, 2010 our sweet daughter Robin was born too early. We had the 20-week ultrasound five days before birth and everything was perfect. Finally we dared to fully enjoy, it became a girl and she was very healthy. I always knew that my first child would be a girl and that I would call her Robin. My friend also had the name Robin in mind for a girl, so that was perfect.
Everything was perfect. The pregnancy came sooner than expected, I had stopped taking the pill for five months, but we never expected that I would get pregnant so quickly. We used other forms of contraception and were not even officially trying. At the time that I was pregnant it took me some time to get used to it, but after the prenatal screening I dared to attach myself and enjoy our child. We called her Guppie because she would be born in March.
The night that went wrong was so fast, I was in shock, but so full of adrenaline that I can remember every second. I got a strange pressure in my lower abdomen that I could not place. I thought I had to pee, but that did not make the pressure any less. I walked back and forth because it could be my intestines, but the pressure did not decrease. On the contrary, it became more and more intense and we decided to go to the hospital. I had just dressed and my friend gave me a hug to give me courage, at that moment my water broke. Almost immediately afterwards the contractions started and my friend called the hospital. We had to go that way urgently. I could hardly walk anymore and the contractions followed quickly. In the hospital she wanted me to climb the examination table to see what was going on. I already knew what was going on because I already felt her head. Immediately after I climbed on the table, Robin was born. Her heart beat for almost two hours, but she was still too small, 21 weeks and not viable.
With Robin on my chest they have tried for an hour and a half to release my placenta, but because I lost too much blood it was removed under narcosis. Robin stayed with my friend and at the time of her death, he sang lullabies for her. Nothing came from all the studies she was completely healthy. Everything indicates cervical insufficiency.
She is the best thing that has happened to me, I love her with all my soul and it hurts a lot to say goodbye to her. Dear Robin, thank you so much that I have been able to enjoy you for 4 and a half months!