On Tuesday, September 19, my midwife told me that there was no fruit in my womb. Only an empty fruit bag. A very big disappointment. You can read my story about this first miscarriage here. That Thursday after I had an appointment at the hospital to take the next step: Excite the miscarriage with medication or go for a curettage. I chose the medication.
I tell you my experience with one here develop miscarriage with medicines. The reason I'm going to tell this is because I think many women who are in the same boat need more information. I actually did that myself. I wanted to know how other women had experienced the miscarriage. Did it get going fast, did they have a lot of pain and how did things go then? What is the procedure of the hospital? Before I went to my appointment I read the experiences of other women and I liked that very much. I had such a small hold. Therefore, dear people. Here my experience.
The first appointment
On Thursday, I had my first appointment at the hospital. I went there with my husband because I expected that I might get some difficult moments. My midwife had warned me that they were going to make a new ultrasound at the hospital first.
"And after the first ultrasound it may very well be that you have to wait another week before you get the medication. They want to be sure that there is really no fruit present. But maybe a second ultrasound is not necessary, " she said.
I hoped I could start the medication right away. Meanwhile, I wanted to have this nightmare behind me. And besides, I am absolutely not a patient person. Gradually I was already looking forward to a next pregnancy, while on the other hand I realized that these were not realistic thoughts yet.
The midwife was a very nice woman. I could really feel that she was annoying to me, but she showed this sympathy in a very subtle way. Nothing exaggerated. I think her behavior helped me to feel at ease and calm. No sadness, no tension. Apparently I had really left the grief behind and this was a final step that I had to make to close it off for good.
I underwent the internal ultrasound and she made several photos of the amniotic sac. After this she went to the gynecologist to discuss what they were going to do: wait another week or immediately give the medication.
'Probably you will get the medication more, it is very clear to me that the fruit bag is empty,' said the midwife before she left. I nodded and smiled at her. 'That would be nice'.
The midwife disappeared and stayed away for a reasonably long time. When she came back she looked at me apologetically.
'I'm sorry, but the gynecologist wants to wait a bit to make sure that there is nothing in it. There is nothing in it, really not. So please do not get any hope, but the gynecologist wants to take it for sure. I can not give the medication yet. '
I looked at her with a tight look and clenched jaws and thought my eyes were spitting fire. At first I did not notice this, but after a few seconds I noticed that she was becoming uncomfortable under my scathing look. She slid back and forth on her chair and said:
"But I've managed to make sure you do not have to wait a full week. You can schedule an appointment for me next Tuesday. I know exactly what the incident was, so you do not have to explain everything to another midwife again. "
I relaxed and realized that I looked at her much more badly than I actually was. She could not do anything about it and what is a week?
No false hope
In itself I understand that they want to be 100% sure that there is really nothing in the fruit bag. Because if there is something in it, it would be awful if you find out too late. On the other hand, you are almost going to cherish a glimmer of hope. Maybe it's a fruit, maybe I was pregnant ...
Hope is sometimes so treacherous ... That's why I just decided not to think about it anymore. That works best.
At the second appointment, 5 days later, an echo was made again. First by the midwife, later the gynecologist was brought in. My whole uterus was examined extensively. The amniotic sac was of course still there and indeed, it was empty anyway. Furthermore, it was examined whether the fruit was somewhere else in my womb.
The elongated dildo (so to speak) was pushed up, down and to the sides. The fruit was nowhere to be seen, which is a good sign. Now I could finally start the medication so that my body would drive out the fruit sac and I could really look ahead. On to a new pregnancy. Because although I only had a vial, I still felt myself pregnant and I wanted to get rid of it.
Develop the miscarriage with Cytotec medication
I got 8 pills. The first 4 I could inject vaginally that same day. I was allowed to know when. However, I was advised to do it at a time when I could be at home. The other 4 had to be 24 hours later. I did not really think about it that much and did it almost immediately after I had finished shopping and was at home. And so it went on:
- 2.30 pm: Pills inserted
- 5.30 pm: I started to feel a nagging pain and I had a little blood loss. I realized that it had started. 6 pm: Cramps got worse and worse until it came to a point where I only sat on the couch with a sour face and watched television. I now felt a constant intense pain.My husband was not allowed to say anything to me. The blood loss was slightly worse but not very intense.
- 8.30 pm: Suddenly I noticed that pain started to decrease slightly.
- 21.15: I went to the bathroom and when I wiped I saw the fruit bag. It looked like a white condom smeared with blood and there was blood in it. It was very different in structure from the dark purple / red blood clots. I have studied it in detail. Somewhere I find it interesting how such a thing looks like. After this I took a picture to send it to my father (who was a GP) so that he could confirm whether it was indeed the fruit bag. He thought so.
The day after
The next day I called to the hospital to announce that the amniotic sac had come out. To be on the safe side, I still had to do the second round of pills to make sure that no tissue would be left behind. With my second round of medication, almost nothing came out. I had mild cramps and a bit of blood loss. On Thursday I hardly had any blood loss and on Friday I got pretty bad at one time. This took a few days and then it went down.
My follow-up was almost 2 weeks after my miscarriage. It could not be earlier. Somewhere I found that very annoying, because you want to have it behind us. Anyway, what can you do about it? At the follow-up I received an echo again. And fortunately, and I really mean that from the bottom of my heart, luckily everything was empty. It was such a relief that I was almost happy. Because now I did not have to do those pills or curettage again. I was done! The miscarriage was behind us! Now I could close everything and focus on the future.
The above was my experience with a miscarriage with medicine. As I said in the beginning, the experiences are very different. There are women who have had an unpleasant experience. But there are also women where the miscarriage was practically the same as with me. You now know at least what you can expect.
Have you experienced the same? I'm very curious how it went with you!