When Teenage mum Samantha found out she was pregnant at the age of eighteen, she did not say anything to her parents for a while.
"My boyfriend and I were together for nine months when I was two weeks late and had the feeling of being pregnant. We then did a test together and it was positive. A huge shock for us both. We lived with our parents and I would go to VWO 6 after the summer holidays. So I almost had my diploma.
On the one hand I was already very happy with that at the time, but also very sad because it simply could not. We did not live together. No diploma. We did not have a stable environment for the child. Enough objections. And my friend immediately had something like: We have to have it removed. He also stayed there all that time.
It took a few weeks and then opted for abortion. Although I wanted to go for it, it just seemed to be no different for us, not at that moment in any case. And for me the most important thing was that I did not want to saddle my friend with an unwanted child.
Still, the abortion did not end because I went to speak with my parents at the last moment, who did not know anything at the time. We have come to the conclusion that an abortion simply was not the right choice. And they told me that they would always support me in any way. For me the choice was made: it would be difficult, maybe even without my boyfriend and dad for my child. But I just could not get my baby away. "
After a conversation with their parents they decide to go for it, especially after having heard that their parents would support them. Friends and other family members also reacted and continued to support.
We're going for it!
"From the moment my boyfriend and I decided to go for it together, we also went for it! He has always done his best and has been a huge support for me because how much support you get from other people, his support is still the most important because he is the daddy of our child.
We also received a lot of support from our parents. It has turned our lives upside down so we also needed that support. Also with practical things, because at that moment we still had no idea how we would do it all. Where would we live, how would I do that with school? "
The first half of Samantha's pregnancy was all pretty easy, she would stay with her parents with the child and her boyfriend with his parents and then they would see further. In the last two months of the pregnancy, Samantha had to stop school because it cost too many energies.
'From that moment on, it was clear that I would be a full-time mommy for at least the first 6 months of his life. I would try again the school year afterwards to get my diploma.
When Damian was born in February 2007 it was all fine. I wanted just like every mother the best of the world for him and I have always done my best for it. However, it turned out to be more difficult in practice than it seemed to be. And I mean mainly that we had seen our roles as father and mother a bit different. We really wanted to be a family, but my friend actually only saw Damian at the weekend and that was not the ideal situation. He therefore missed a lot and that was more difficult than we had thought. In addition, that of course also meant that the largest part of the care came down to me. Occasionally it was also quite heavy. Of course I had my parents, but I wanted to do everything myself. In that sense, I did not really ask my parents for help. They could just be Grandpa and Grandma. "
The life of Samantha has changed drastically and after the first period of living at home there had to be more changes.
Looking for a home
'After a few months, we started looking for a house of our own, because we were not very happy in this way. In the end we started living together when Damian was 7 months old. That has been a difficult time for us. Living together and then immediately with a child, where my friend also had to get used to. I was not used to always taking care of Damian, while in the 7 months of Damian's life he was able to retain his old life for the most part. Meanwhile we live together for 10 months and it is as if it has never been different. We are fine. We are just a real family, just like everyone else. We are happy with each other and enjoy every day that we have together. From September I will go back to school to still get a diploma, so that is going to be all right.
It has been a difficult time. A lot of changes in a short time and a life that I could not have imagined in advance. It has changed my life and me so much in a positive way that I really would not want it any other way, and luckily my friend thinks the same about it. '
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