"Move on", I say annoyed. "
"Hello, then I'm lying against the cupboard", my husband replies me.
"What time is it?"
"Quarter to five."
"Pfff in this bed for another two hours at one and a half meters."
I climb out of bed over my husband. I see our two girls lying on the other side of the caravan. They are lying next to each other. So sweet, that will be different in three hours. I take my toilet roll and put my feet on the damp grass. I enjoy the tranquility that dominates the campsite. Once on the toilet I am relieved that the little fetus is still warm in my stomach. After three miscarriages the trust in my body is still far to find. The nausea during the day reassures me, knowing that there are still pregnancy hormones present that cause nausea. In the course of the evening my belly is more visible. At that moment I am as carefree.
The great enjoyment could begin
What would I have liked to go back to the moment when I gave my husband another push, where my biggest concern was that he was so close to me. A carefree period in a retrospective perspective. After 12 weeks we could breathe a sigh of relief. This little sprout decided to stick in my stomach. We bought a bath cape with a fox on it. The great enjoyment could begin. I walked into the baby's room in the evening and fantasized that a snoring baby was lying in the crib. The hug was already bought and until the time that the little one was born, the cuddle could stay in my arms. Thankful that we can take this one more time.
After my first insult on Easter Monday in 2014, I am insult-free for two and a half years. After many meetings, minutes and again the meeting agenda with the two of us, we came to the decision to attempt to expand our family with a third child. You can permanently fill in the action that resulted from this.
From afar I hear the sirens of the ambulance approaching. I close my eyes again, because I am tired. I hear my husband climbing out of bed and wonder what he is going to do. "Hello Madam", I hear a strange male voice say. I startle and see two ambulance brothers standing at my feet. I want to get up, but my muscles hurt. I'll just lie down. The brother is standing next to my bed.
"How are you doing?" He asks.
"Well, I think," I answer.
"Do you know what happened?"
My feeling is elusive, I do not know. And then suddenly I see my husband. His attitude is strong, his eyes betray the intense sadness.
"You have had an insult. We would like to do some tests, can you get up? "
He grabs me by the arm and I manage to sit down. At that moment I feel something crazy. I look down and see my belly there.
"Dirk, I'm pregnant. How is that possible? No! I just had an insult, I just had an insult, I just had an insult. No !!! "The world disappears under my feet. What did I do to my baby?
Why did I call this on myself? How I have been selfish. Those three miscarriages were all signs that we should not defy fate by wishing a third party.
Can I go back to the bed of one and a half meters by 1 meter? Please?