"So, what does she say to you. Unbelievable! "" No, no, she is exactly her father, just look at her mouth and eyes! "
From the moment my daughter Lune was born, she is compared in terms of appearance to the physical of her mother and mine.
At each maternity visit, friends and family apparently needed to look for similarities. Sometimes to bad. Of course it is also nice to hear that your newborn daughter has a lot of you away. Hair color, the shape of the nose, mouth and ears, the color of the eyes, while asking aloud whether it will still change ?, the dimple in the cheek; all physical characteristics of our little girl were reviewed.
Apparently, comparing your child with you as a father and mother involves many people. In my own baby book from 42 years ago the question came up about who I now seemed to be the most. In 2018 it is a question that apparently still needs to be answered. It is less fun when people think aloud "that they do not know who your daughter actually looks like". First you laugh at it, or do you make it a little joke that she is "really not from the milkman". But at the umpteenth time you still feel yourself uncomfortable.
... she recognized 'something' from me in my daughter ...
Something of me
A nurse at the daycare where I bring my daughter once or twice a week, made it even worse last year. Of course she did not mean it like that, but the remark that she recognized something from me in my daughter, but that she did not look like her mother at all, hurt my girlfriend pretty badly. It actually made her a little angry. Of course, everyone may have their opinion, but please be careful with what message you are transferring, and how it can get in to a parent.
... that stubborn she has from her mother ...
Behavior of your child
And just when you think that the comparisons in terms of appearance decrease, people from your immediate surroundings will pay attention to the character and behavior of your child. "I think she really has that stubborn one of her mother." "All that clambering about what she does, from whom does she have that ...? "Your brother was like that", my own mother says for example. To give an explanation for the climatic features that my daughter of just one and a half years now often shows, and in which every domestic staircase is seen as a challenge. But yes, my three year younger brother is really not the father of my daughter, since he has already provided for two nieces ...
The most beautiful and most valuable comment comes from my mother-in-law. In response to a question in her presence, of which my daughter has the most weight, she always says: "She seems the most in itself!" And everyone should do it.